A tale of two cats...

This past August, I lost my "small grey cat" who I came to call Shiraz. A sweet and sexy, tiny stray who showed up one day in 2008 - and disappeared almost a year to the day.

I discovered on that day, and subsequently what it is like to loose a pet. We still don't know what happened to Shiraz, we looked for her high and low, for weeks putting up signs, running to the SPCA, or around the corner when a call came in about a sighting, she was close and yet...not quite there. On one fateful night, she had to go out and explore, and she never came back.

Ironically little did I know, that two weeks later, another elusive cat that had crossed my path would also bring me grief, but this one would be the celluloid type. In December 2008, I directed the short film entitled The Cat in the Pan, shot on location in Montréal.

I worked on the project as the Director throughout the fall and winter of 08 and 09 and felt great joy and satisfaction to be working at my true calling in life. But life sometimes has unexpected surprises. Never did I imagine what could transpire during the postproduction of this film, when the producer decided to change a few things along the way.

We had a divergence of opinion... regarding the ending of the story, and the producer decided to recut the film and to add herself a co-director credit at the same time. Why not after all, who would mind ?

But what about issues like copywrite, artistic license, theft, fraud, or respect of an agreement? what's the difference anyway? They are just words and concepts after all. But they began to swirl in my head, and I was left perplexed by this unbelievable reality.

After all I was the sole director on this little film... I set up the shots, directed the actors, my name was on the slate! and on the call sheet!!!!!...I did my shot lists, breakdowns, camera angles, working all along on the script et all. How could I fix this injustice? Could I stand by the screen and scream the truth to all who watched my film ?

To date the credits have not been restituted, and at this point will probably stay that way for posterity. Reflecting on this turn of events, today I feel a great deal of gratitude in letting go of what was for a few weeks nothing less than hell.

I learned about intrinsic human and animal nature. It's in our nature to be selfish, to satify our own needs - like a cat, looking out for number one. But it's also in our nature to love and care and feel sadness for things that are lost, when we have no control over events.

This control, often desired and coveted, feels good when we have it, but when it's taken away, as it was in these two cases, I was humbled by the pain, the challenge and the injustice. I came to realized what matters most in all of these experiences.

What could I learn from these feelings? Something that I couldn't pay anyone enough to teach me for such a precious lesson : First hand insight- now I can feel grateful to have lived these experiences, which forced me to grow, through discomfort, and to appreciate what is in the here and the now, right at this moment.

These cat tales have shown me to never take for granted today or assume anything will be there tomorrow. These milestones in my life, have awakened my gratitude and appreciation for life. From loss come growth and overcoming our challenges helps us be our best.